Ex-wife destroys 14-year-old daughter's $2.7k gaming laptop, refuses to reimburse ex-husband's wife who bought it: 'Time for small claims court'

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    6 7 8 9 0 R FGH K
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    AITA for continuously asking my husband's ex-wife to pay me back the money of the computer she broke?
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    I (39F) have two step kids (14M) and (16F) from my husband's previous marriage. I can't say we have always had the best relationship between the 3 of us, but it has improved a lot over the years. I wish I could say the same about their bio mom, not that we see or talk to each other that much but when we do, we are both cold in our attitudes towards each other.
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    Going to the issue at hand. For Christmas last year I bought my stepdaughter a gaming laptop. Before hand she used her crappy school laptop for school work and she was using my husband's PC for her gaming hobby. The laptop cost me 2K alone and with the mouse and gaming headphones I bought alongside it, I paid around 2.7k total. My
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    stepdaughter has been using this laptop for everything ever since then. A huge improvement over her old gig. There hasn't been any issue with anything till recently. My stepdaughter started school a month and a half ago and she's already had a few tests and projects and she has not done well on them at all as she is barely passing her classes. Her mom blamed the gaming
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    hobby for this and took the laptop. Since I purchased the laptop myself I asked if she could return it to me since it is technically MY property. It took her about a week to respond. She sent me pictures of the laptop. The keyboard is all dented, the screen is completely smashed to bits. I have no clue what could have caused all this damage (she said she accidentally dropped
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    something heavy over it) but I told her that she would have to pay me back the worth of the laptop and sent her a picture of the receipt. She had a "what the told me to "thieving reaction (she said this) and off and called me a ." She told my husband what I asked and my husband thinks I was too direct when I asked for payment. AITA?
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    ReviewOk929 · 13h ago • NTA She told my husband what I asked and my husband thinks I was too direct when I asked for payment You: "Look at what your ex did to the laptop I bought" Him: "Oh that's awful" You: "Yeah I sent her a piccy of the receipt and asked her to pay me back"
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    Him: "You directly asked her for the money for the laptop which she obviously destroyed? Well you were far too direct with that my dear" Me: What the did he just say???????? Yeah she destroyed the laptop and your husband's reactions is puzzling to say the least.
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    Accomplished_Two1611 • 13h ago It was a gift. If the mom destroyed it, then the daughter is out of a laptop. However, I question if the actual laptop was destroyed. I smell bait and switch. In any case, once you give the laptop, you can't ask for it back.
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    watermelonyuppie • 12h ago NTA. I see people debating whether or not it's your property. It really doesn't matter. In situations where people are co- parenting outside a relationship, they need to consult each other before depriving their kids of things the other parent bought them, especially expensive things. Granted, big gifts should also be discussed by both parents before they are purchased.
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    Communication is important. Regardless, the mom broke the laptop. She should replace it because she didn't not buy it and it wasn't hers to take or destroy. She should have reached out and asked you guys to take possession of the laptop until the daughter's grades improved.
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    . jadasgrl 12h ago Time for small claims court.
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    computerconflict19 OP. 13h ago I gave the laptop to my stepdaughter, not her mother. Going by technicality, that computer was still MY property even though I gifted it since my stepdaughter is still underage.
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    Balawulf 13h ago • I guess hubby will be okay being the one getting your money back. NTA.
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    Vicious1915 • 10h ago Let me fix this for you: Your stepdaughter's mother broke your stepdaughter's laptop. I would just let this rest on SD's mom's shoulders and reputation. If SD forgives her mom and is ok with her mom not replacing it, then SD is out of a laptop. If SD wants it replaced, then you and hubby should assist. ...but it's not your property. You gave it as a gift.
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    aslynnxhalex • 12h ago NTA. Taking the laptop from her daughter was just unnecessary. She could've given it to her ex husband instead. For her to even destroy it just because she got carried away by her emotions is just plain childish and the audacity to call you a thief because she was ignorant how much a gaming laptop costs.
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    rantingskull • 12h ago NTA not sure how you could indirectly ask for the money but it sounds like your husband had spent so long picking his battles with her that he doesn't see how crazy this was.
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    I don't believe this was accidental but even if it was, it doesn't make her behaviour any less deranged. I get wanting your child to do well in school but you don't wreck their stuff or leave in a situation where it could be wrecked just because you blame.
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    Chances are she won't pay it back unless forced (ie legally) and if she does she will likely find some other way to retaliate. The fair thing to do is for her to pay you back but be prepared for a battle if you push this and make sure your husband has your back.

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